It Was You
by monochromatic days
Summary: "They doubted me when they learnt the truth about me. They all did. All of them, except for you." A short drabble on Natsume Takashi's POV.


**Disclaimer: I own nothing! **

**A/N: Just a little random short drabble due to me watching Natsume Yuujinchou halfway. I just felt like I had to write it. Enjoy!**

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><p>I've always been alone.<p>

Always alone.

When I was growing up, every one around me was afraid of what I was said. Especially when I was able to see things that no one else could.

I was alone.

_Always __alone._

Maybe I've already been used to it.

_But __if __that __was __the __case, __why __do __I __feel __such __an __empty __void __in __my __heart?_

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><p>I hate them.<p>

_Why __am __I __able __to __see __them?_

_Why_ _am __I __cursed __with __such __strange abilities__?_

I hate humans.

_Why __do __they __always __doubt __me?_

_Why_ _don't __they __try __and __understand?_

_Why don't __they __put __themselves __in __my __shoes __for __once?_

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><p>The couple I'm living with now has been nice to me.<p>

Maybe _too _nice.

It hurts. I don't want to get too attached because I didn't want them to pass me on to someone else like how all the other "distant relatives" of mine did because of me being able to see Yokai.

Everything hurts in the end so maybe it was better if I kept my distance. But it's been nothing but a failure on my part and I wound up getting more attached. The feeling of having a family to come home to, everyday. I like it.

I kept them from my classmates too. And eventually I was able to make some close friends. And it was also the same thing.

It was nice to experience the normal life for once, feeling the warmth of a family and friends.

It was nice.

It's true that I feel more wholesome now.

_But __why __do __I __still feel __so __empty __inside?_

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><p>After learning about the Yuujinchou, I've started to make some Yokai friends along the way. They weren't as bad as I though they were. Some of them were really kind and friendly.<p>

Huh. I guess such Ayakashi are real too, just like how some humans are kind too.

But the humans are only kind to me now because I'm hiding the truth from them.

I doubt they will understand once I tell them the truth.

It has always been like that.

It is still like that.

It will continue to be like that.

That's why I will keep it all to myself, just so I can have a normal life, even if it is just for a while longer.

I'll continue to keep these feelings within me so I wouldn't bother anyone else.

_But __I __wonder __when __I'll __start __to __break __after __keeping __all __these __feelings __to __myself._

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><p>It was when I met Natori Shuuichi.<p>

Sure we disagreed on ways of handling Yokai. That was to be expected.

He was an exorcist and I was trying to free the ones who have been bound by a contract between them and my deceased grandmother.

But even then, it was nice having someone who could see what I saw.

Feel what I felt.

I some ways, we could understand each other; and that was where I was able to find a support to lean on.

Maybe it was just me being silly. But he was the only one who could fully understand me. Sure it was probably because we had the same abilities, but still, it was nice.

_It was a nice feeling._

Every time he has a break between shooting and exorcism, he would pop by and we would have some time to spend together. Sure there were pesky ayakashi trying to disrupt our peaceful times, mostly because I had the Yuujinchou and also we were able to see them in clear view, even if we wanted to ignore them.

I thought I had built up a strong barrier, to block out everyone around me.

I hated humans after all.

They ostracised me since I was young without even trying to get to know me better.

It was only when I was living with the Fujiwaras that I learnt to keep mum about my abilities.

I didn't want them to hate me.

I didn't.

I didn't know when I began to feel like this.

I didn't know when I began to crave for human companionship, to be accepted, to be loved.

But even then, I still couldn't open up that well to people, unlike with Natori-san.

I don't know what this feeling is.

Whenever I'm with Natori-san, I feel like I can be myself and I wouldn't be rejected.

Whenever I'm with Natori-san, I feel like I can just let go and relax, without having to cautiously watch ever move I make so as not to cause trouble for someone else.

Whenever I'm with Natori-san, I feel like… There are butterflies in my stomach.

This is all still too new to me and I would like to find out more what this actually means.

Maybe…

Just maybe…

I like Natori-san?

That would be a little weird, wouldn't it?

_Haha_

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><p>I didn't know when I started opening up to people and yokai, alike.<p>

I've only remembered keeping to myself most of the time, not talking to either.

Was it because of you that I started to be more accepting towards both people and yokai?

Was it because of you that I started to be able to open my eyes and see the things around me more clearly? That people and yokai alike aren't as bad as I thought they were?

Maybe, maybe it was you.

_Thank you, Natori-san. _

_Thank you for filling a void in my heart._

_Thank you for making me feel all these emotions._

_Thank you for letting me know that there will always be someone out there for me who wouldn't judge me._

_Thank you for being the first person to let me know that I wasn't alone in this world._

_Thank you._

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><p><strong>AN: Ok. So halfway through my hands started having a mind of its own and wrote the rest of the story on a whim. But then again, I didn't know how it would have ended so I just left it as it is. It isn't very good, but still, like I said, I had to write it. Its my first fic for this fandom too. Thanks for reading! ;)**


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